Thursday, June 23, 2011

please don't feed the lonley ( I wrote this blog a while back just found it on my computer it's kinda funny)

Sitting in my living room relaxing after a busy day, both of my angels are asleep! This should be the time of day I look forward to. “Me time“ but that is the problem “me time” is alone time nobody here to share the Ahhh rest moment with …When this house gets quiet is when the loneliness sets in. I try to avoid this feeling as much as possible I’ll tell you why. Loneliness in my world is a “eat” emotion along with a lot of my other emotions but, this particular emotion has scary strong cravings that come with it ..Sadly loneliness is something I can’t really avoid with hubby gone L ..So feeling lonely tonight and the second I start feeling it I have this over powering craving for chocolate ..I mean the type of craving where I want to stick my face in a bucket.. UH NO WAIT! the kind of craving where I want to stick my BODY in a tub of chocolate and drink it through my pores! What do you do with yourself when this kind of thing comes over you! How sad that food or any object for that matter can be so powerful! I realize while feeling this sad feeling FOOD is an addiction a terrible one! This leaves me wondering why I can’t be one of those people that CAN’T eat when they are upset God knows as a Army wife I would be a size 00 by now! Better yet why can’t I just eat whatever I want and stay thin? For whatever reason that’s just not how my body works! Just like any addiction I have to exercise will power and that’s exactly what I do! I made myself a cup of coffee and rationalized with myself, I really thought things through, I mean did I really want to un-due my whole day and cancel out a wonderful workout for a tiny moment of self-gratification? I also thought about the goals I have set and why I want to reach them! So I decided if I gave in and ate that chocolate the food wins and I could not let the food win ! Me 1 food 0! On a amazing note today I weighed myself I’m 150lbs 3 lbs down 20 to go J

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